My best cooking tip? Open the can. Heat. Eat.
I’m a terrible cook. Yes, I know I was on a baking show. Yes, I will gladly spend my entire Sunday afternoon toiling over a triple-layered banana caramel cake. But dinner? Ugh. I’d rather step on Lego barefoot.
But, as is the MODERN way of life, I am in an equal domestic partnership. Which is the un-sexiest term since de facto came along. But you know what was sexy? The fact that my equal domestic partnership was basically me working all day and night and coming home to a hot meal on the table. YES. EQUALITY FOR ALL!
Eventually my ever-patient partner said ‘I’m bored of doing all the cooking’ and so I promised to start trying to help. In the first week I tried to disguise takeaway by presenting it in actual crockery. In the second week, he had to tell me that while he loved toasted cheese sandwiches, he didn’t think he could eat the 8th one. And in the third week, I lovingly plated up steaks that were still raw on the inside. He re-cooked his. To prove a point, I stubbornly ate mine.
Things were starting to fray.
Yes. A cookbook. You know the things? Usually on shelves looking nice, or perched on coffee tables so people think you’re gourmet who spends their leisure time perusing Gourmet Traveller (and not eating pretzels and binge watching OITNB).