I am 35 years of age, still considered relatively young by some. I have been with my husband for 16 years. Of those 16 years, I’ve been married 11. To all the maths nerds out there, I’m guessing you’ve already figured out that this means I’ve been with the same man since I was 19. Since we are incorporating a maths lesson into today’s post it’s also probably notable to mention, that I have an eleven year old daughter. Go on, you can say it – Shotgun. I kid, I wanted to marry and commit to my husband as much as he did. So much so, I even proposed to him.
Because he was my lightning bolt moment. You know the one? Maybe you don’t, and I know it’s clichéd, but to this day, I still can’t explain it. The night we officially got together, i.e. had sex on the beach after a heavy night of drinking, it was like we were magnetised. And instantly, we couldn’t bear to be apart.
To be honest, we’d met a few times before that night and I had found him to be a complete arsehole. An absolute hot arsehole, but an arsehole none the less. He was rude, obnoxious, smoked a packet of Longbeach a day and wouldn’t give me the time of day. Bad boy personified. I could not have wanted him more.
16 years on, the lightning bolt is more like a flickering light bulb and spending a night apart is almost a cause for celebration. So sometimes, yeah, I contemplate, did I commit too early? Have I accomplished enough? Did I experience the world before my chance to be footloose and fancy free was taken away from me? I mean at 24 I was married, mortgaged and a mother. Did I miss out? Is it only natural to contemplate if the grass is greener or would the mowing of said lawn, simply be another chore I would have to fit into an already overcrowded weekend?
And it wasn’t like I was the only girl at the time getting married. It didn’t feel too young, it felt right. But now, well now announcing at 21 that you were engaged and getting married at 24 would almost be frowned upon. There would be cries of “Live a little”. “Don’t settle down yet, you’ve got to experience the world and travel”. You’ll regret not trying out more before you buy”