'The invitations for drinks or dinner stopped coming. Then I realised what was happening.'

This is a cry for help, masked as an opinion piece.

I need someone to listen, to understand the unique horror I'm currently facing: the complete and utter collapse of my social calendar thanks to a phenomenon known as dawn culture.

It sounds lovely, doesn't it? Dawn. A fresh start. The gentle rise of the sun. The birds chirping… Don't be fooled. Dawn rhymes with spawn and this is a spawn of Satan.

Dawn culture refers to that specific type of person who wakes up at 6am (the latest) to do EVERYTHING and more.

They're up. They're exercising. They're walking. They're meeting for coffee at the hour when I am deep in the most crucial part of my REM cycle. And apparently, this isn't just a niche, 'A-list influencer' who lives in Bondi thing.

It's a whole movement that's infecting my entire life.

Watch: The city that wakes up the earliest in the world is in Australia. Post continues below.

Suddenly, all the people in my life who are roughly my age have decided that being a night owl is tragic, gross and deeply uncool.

The texts have changed. It used to be, "Drinks after work?" or "Dinner at 7.30pm?" Now, my phone is buzzing at 6.30am (!!!) with messages like, "Are you free for a coffee?"

No, babe, the sun isn't even free for a coffee. I am not functioning. I am barely even conscious.

It's completely derailed the rhythm of friendship. Gone are the spontaneous late-night walks, the deep 9pm debriefs, the joy of being messy after dark. Everything is now structured around a timetable that is clearly designed for people who run on sunlight and kale.

I am not one of those people. My weekends are for waking up and hoping I don't have a hangover. That's the bar. Yet, I'm now facing the existential dread of realising that if I don't start waking up before my already respectable 8.10am alarm, I'm going to lose all my friendships.

And it's not just friendships. I've noticed it leaching into my dating life, too. I once saw a profile that made my soul sad.

This guy was listing his 'typical Sunday' and it read like a schedule for a competitive Olympic athlete: Sunrise, ocean swim, breakfast at a café, going to the gym, house chores, going to a spa for a sauna session, meal prepping for the week, watching the sunset and in bed by 9.30pm.

9.30pm! At 9.30pm, I'm putting my third coat of sticky lip gloss on and leaving the house.

Also, do you really need to watch the sun TWICE in ONE day? Give me a break. The thought of 'watching the sunset' and immediately tucking myself into bed makes me want to scream into a pillow.

The Wall Street Journal reported last year that 9pm has become the cool time to go to bed for young people.

Even dinner reservations are getting earlier. I went for a 5pm dinner the other day because I couldn't get a booking later than that. It was just me and like, someone's grandma.

Listen: Why dawn culture has suddenly become a 'thing' on the Mamamia Out Loud podcast. Post continues below.

We have become obsessed with breakfast, and honestly, it's gotten out of hand. The 'morning economy' is booming: the cafes, the yoga classes, the non-alcoholic morning raves (yes, really).

People are drinking less, which is apparently a 'good thing,' but I just miss my social anxiety being comfortably cushioned by a light white wine spritzer on a rooftop bar after work.

Now, before I get super cranky, I have to call myself out as a hypocrite here. I recently went on a work trip to Perth and thanks to daylight savings, Sydney is currently three hours ahead.

So, for two days, I was waking up at 5.30am. For two days, I was awake before the sun. For two days, I was better than everyone else.

And yes, for those two days, I felt good, I felt fresh, I felt like the best version of myself.

Yes, I am better than you. Image: Supplied.

I was determined to keep this early adjustment going when I got back to Sydney.

My alarm went off, I shot out of bed, I went to my kitchen to make myself a coffee, I sat on my couch to drink it, and then I promptly fell back asleep.

I later woke up at 8.30am feeling like trash.

Was I proud that I at least tried to be part of the dawn culture? Sure. Will I try again? Nah.

The peak days for this Dawn Culture are apparently Wednesdays and Thursdays, which I can only assume is because people are trying to get their exercise and socialising in before they have to go to the office midweek. We're all starting work earlier and earlier, so they're compensating by forcing themselves up at 3am to get to a HYROX training class. It's madness.

Fitness tracker Jawbone UP, found that Brisbane is the earliest city in the world (yes, THE WORLD) to go to bed and the earliest to wake up. They're in bed by 10pm and up at 6am, getting a great night's sleep while the rest of the world is averaging six hours.

Not only is Dawn Culture forcing me to become an unnatural early riser, but it's also ruined the only actual benefit of getting up early — the peace and tranquillity.

The hordes are there, waiting with their dogs in long coffee queues, their perfect athleisure, and their smug, well-rested faces with bright sparkling eyes.

It's time to accept the inevitable. I guess I have to start getting up early. That's where all the aspirational people are.

Maybe tomorrow I'll grab a 6am coffee with my friends (Narrator: She in fact will not be doing that).

If you want more from Emily Vernem, you can follow her on Instagram @emilyvernem.

Feature image: Supplied.