'In 2014, I started dating the love of my life. It was the beginning of a 4-year nightmare.'

Every night, Kristina* would put her phone down on the bedside table only to hear it relentlessly ping.

Ding. Ding. Ding.

Dozens of comments from burner accounts flooded her Instagram — harassment that would vanish by morning.

"My husband started getting calls during the middle of the night, messages saying, 'kill yourself'," Kristina told Mamamia.

It was just the beginning of their nightmare.

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It all began in 2012, when Kristina's now-husband Chris* received a friend request on Facebook from a stranger after he was featured in a local newspaper. The one night while out, he ran into the woman at a bar.

Jess* struck up a conversation, and they exchanged numbers before Chris rejoined his friends.

Fast-forward to 2013, when Chris had moved interstate for work training. He received a message from Jess, who was in a nearby town, and suggested they spend the day exploring the area together.

"She got the train down, they got lunch and saw a movie, and walked around the town," Kristina says.

But Chris quickly realised something wasn't right.

"He picked up on her craziness. She started to say things, so he had to make it clear he wasn't interested, saying 'mate'," Kristina explained.

"He stopped responding to her texts. She was full on, saying, 'We're meant to be. We're in love.' But he wasn't interested."

Despite his clear disinterest, Jess didn't get the message.

"She started getting really savage, saying horrible things to him. 'Screw you then. I hope you kill yourself.'"

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Eventually the messages stopped. And for a while, there was silence.

In 2014, Chris and Kristina, long-time friends, got together romantically. It should have been a time of love and happiness — but Jess was about to strike again.

"I started posting photos of us together on my Instagram, and I started getting all these notifications during the night… just trolling me," Kristina said.

The harassment didn't stop at social media. The calls and texts to Chris picked up again, too. Soon, no one in their lives was safe from the abuse.

"I had people commenting on my photos from work, and she'd troll them. I did damage control constantly," Kristina said.

"We were quite scared of her."

Kristina was spammed with abusive messages from her stalker. Image. Supplied.

'She was a nightmare.'

Things came to a head when Jess outed Chris's identity online — breaching his privacy and putting him, and his family, at risk due to the nature of his job.

"When you're in that role, you're not allowed to be on social media with your full name, you're not allowed to be searchable," Kristina says.

Chris went to his manager for help.

"We got an AVO that afternoon straight away, which she continued to breach anyway," Kristina said. "It was very tough."

The harassment didn't stop. Jess began posting incoherent ramblings accusing the couple of unfounded things.

"She was a nightmare. She believes I'm a paid actress playing her in my life with my hubby," Kristina says.

"I'd tag my location on Facebook. Ten minutes later, she'd tag herself there. She was actually following me at that point. It was really scary."

The police didn't seem to take the situation seriously, said Kristina. One officer even told her that Jess "seemed normal," while others were reluctant to help, simply suggesting she set her socials to private and lay low for a while.

"I was like, why should I? Why can't you just help me? I like having the freedoms that I deserve. You need to get her help.

"She was awake all night, every night going nuts, and then deleting it by the morning," Kristina said.

And it wasn't just online abuse. Every year, Jess would recreate that first date she and Chris went on — lunch at the same restaurant, a movie and walk around the city.

"I had no clue where her head space was at. If she was going to come and find me," Kristina said. "At one point, she'd written a comment [asking] for someone to take my life for $200,000. I was worried about that."

Eventually, Chris and Kristina had enough. They packed up their lives and moved back to their home town, hoping to find some peace surrounded by their support network while Chris was away for work.

But Jess found an interview the couple had done about buying a new home. Now, she knew where they lived.

"It's unnerving that she knows which estate I live in. Is she going to rock up at the door? Is she going to come for my kids and dogs?"

A 'reign of terror'.

By 2018, Jess had mostly stopped contacting them. But the trauma lingered.

"She's always in the back of my mind," Kristina says. "We are in fear of her if she reemerges."

"Her reign of terror was 2014 to 2018. Every day, every night," she says. "I used to say she was the third person in our relationship."

Kristina feels deeply let down by the police for not taking her concerns seriously or offering Jess the help she clearly needed.

"It's so disappointing when you go to the police for help and they're like, that's too hard," she said.

She doesn't want others to suffer in silence. She wants people to know that help is available, even if it wasn't there for her.

"While I didn't really receive it, there is help available," she said.

"The police didn't get her assessed; they assumed she was normal even though she was sending me death threats. The police failed her.

"I was angry no one was helping her, and she was affecting my life and inserting fear into our otherwise normal life."

Kristina is calling for action, urging police to take a more thorough approach to these sorts of situations, instead of making assumptions.

"Things need to change."

If you or someone you know is being stalked or monitored, you can call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732, text 0458 737 732 or visit their website for online chat and video call services

*Name has been changed for privacy reasons.

Feature image: Getty and supplied.