'I just got married, and this show about relationships is the most confronting thing I've watched.'

I should be on cloud nine right now. After all, I just got married to the love of my life a few months ago. We had the most romantic ceremony. The reception was everything we dreamed of. It was literally a perfect day to kick off a beautiful life together.

And that's when I made what might be the most questionable newlywed decision ever — I started watching Couples Therapy.

For those who haven't seen it, Couples Therapy is exactly what it sounds like: four seasons of real couples attending actual therapy sessions with psychologist Dr. Orna Guralnik. Nothing is scripted, nothing is held back, and absolutely nothing is sugar-coated.

And, upon first viewing, it felt like a huge mistake.

Watch the trailer for season 4 of Couples Therapy. Article continues after video. 

Here's the thing about watching couples in real-life therapy sessions trying to work through their issues — it feels oddly familiar, but it's deeply confronting at the same time. There are moments where watching these two people tear each other apart feels so foreign, you're certain it could never be you. But occasionally — just occasionally — you see your own behaviours reflected back at you. And that's the scariest part.

Every passive-aggressive comment, every unresolved argument, every pattern that these couples have fallen into over many years together. There's something deeply unsettling about watching real people sit across from each other and talk about how they've grown to resent the person they once loved more than anyone else. It's even more unsettling when you see glimpses of yourself in the conflict.

In one particularly jarring session, a wife explains how she's been keeping score of everything her husband does wrong, building an internal case against him like a prosecutor preparing for trial.

'Couples Therapy' is both foreign and relatable. Image: Showtime. 

In another instance, a husband is so defensive, he can't even hear what his wife is trying to say to him. Again and again, he keeps bringing it back to how he's feeling, rather than trying to be curious.

And while this is the extreme, you can't help but feel nervous when you sometimes display similar behaviours in your own relationship. I, too, have been guilty of keeping score when it comes to things my partner has done wrong, or getting overly defensive in the moment. There are moments where I haven't felt 100 per cent heard or understood.

What makes Couples Therapy so confronting isn't the big, dramatic blowups (though there are plenty of those). It's the subtle, near-invisible ways that partners slowly disconnect from each other over time. It's the slight rolling of eyes when one partner starts telling a story; the defensive posture when criticism is brought up; the way one person can completely shut down while the other desperately tries to connect.

Dr. Guralnik doesn't let any of it slide. She calls out these micro-moments with precision, showing how these tiny interactions build the foundation for major relationship breakdowns.

It's the subtle, invisible breakdown of a relationship that the most terrifying. Image: Showtime. 

Still, one thing that does keep me coming back to Couples Therapy (beyond the raw emotional moments) is how refreshingly diverse the casting is. In a media landscape that often falls short on representation, this show feels like a breath of fresh air.

We get LGBTQ+ couples navigating the unique challenges and universal struggles of their relationships. We see people of colour bringing their cultural contexts and experiences to therapy. We witness relationships with varying structures, whether they're monogamous or polyamorous, proving that relationship struggles are never a one-size-fits-all situation.

This matters. Not just for the warm fuzzy feeling of inclusivity, but because it shows viewers that relationship work is universal.

After the — admittedly — very strong feelings of watching the show began to wear off, I realised that watching this show as a newlywed might actually be one of the smartest things I've done. Rather than waiting until we've fallen into destructive patterns that have calcified over decades, we now have a roadmap of what not to do.

Watching the show, I found myself frequently checking in with myself.

"Do I do that?" 

"Has he ever felt this way?" 

"How would we handle this situation?"

It's turned into my own form of preventative therapy. We're learning to recognise the early warning signs of communication breakdown before they become habitual.

The most profound moments in Couples Therapy come when the protective layers of anger and resentment are finally stripped away to reveal the raw vulnerability that lies underneath. Almost invariably, there's a person who just wants to be seen, heard, and loved — but has lost the ability to ask for it directly.

The diverse representation on the show is part of its charm. Image: Showtime. 

It's a startling reminder that underneath all our defences, we're all just seeking connection. Even in the most bitter arguments between couples who seem to genuinely dislike each other, there's still that fundamental human need driving everything.

For a show with such heavy subject matter, it's surprisingly hopeful. Some couples make breakthrough progress. Others realise they're better apart. But all of them come to understand themselves better.

My takeaway as a newlywed? I won't lie… there were moments while watching the show that I thought to myself, out of complete and utter fear, "I hope we never end up like that."

For a show that is so heavy, it has a hopeful undertone. Image: Showtime. 

But the beauty of watching Couples Therapy is that it serves as both a warning and a guide. We're learning the language of healthy communication and how to avoid the common pitfalls of a long-term connection. Not to mention, it makes me want to hold my husband a little bit tighter.

So, whether you're about to get married, whether you're in a relationship or not, I highly recommend this show. I might recommend a comedic palette cleanser every few episodes to lighten the load, but trust me when I say that the uncomfortable moments are worth the relationship wisdom you might gain.

Perhaps that's the true genius of Couples Therapy — it forces us to witness the raw, unfiltered moments we typically avoid in our own relationships, all from the safety of our living rooms. Turns out the most confronting television isn't about serial killers or supernatural horrors, but simply about two people trying to remember why they fell in love in the first place.

Couples Therapy is streaming on SBS On Demand and Paramount+. 

Feature Image: Showtime.