Model Chrissy Teigen live-tweets nightmare flight after "suspicious" airport mix-up.

For most, flying eight hours and landing exactly where you took off would be an inconvenience. A nightmare.

But, for model-come-detective Chrissy Teigen, it was an opportunity to uncover hidden identities and expose an international government conspiracy… well, something like that.

The 32-year-old was travelling with her husband, singer John Legend, and their daughter, one-year-old Luna, from Los Angeles to Tokyo for the holidays when their plane was forced to turn around mid-flight because an “unauthorised” passenger was on board.

Teigen live-tweeted the whole experience and it goes from questioning the effectiveness of the “badoop” boarding pass scanners, to the government locking people in rooms and dulling their minds with Real Housewives. 

Utterly genius.

It starts like this:

a flying first for me: 4 hours into an 11 hour flight and we are turning around because we have a passenger who isn’t supposed to be on this plane. Why…why do we all gotta go back, I do not know

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

So many questions and I have no answers. Either do they. This person must be mortified though

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

Lmao after all this I will have spent 8 hours on a flight to nowhere. Like we were all just havin a great time up here flyin in the sky watching gran torino time to go home now

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

Then, she begins questioning the person. Apparently the individual boarded the wrong flight – the wrong airline, even.

What happened? Chrissy asks. Why can’t the “suspect” just be sent back to the US after the plane lands in Tokyo? WHO IS THE PERSON?

This person is so lucky that we will all have to deplane. Imagine having to walk off alone. The shame!

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

I won’t be able to sleep until I know how this person figured out they were on the wrong flight. That’s all I ask. 150 people have been majorly inconvenienced, please, just tell me

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

They keep saying the person had a United ticket. We are on ANA. So basically the boarding pass scanner is just a beedoop machine that makes beedoop noises that register to nowhere

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

Soon, Teigen starts morphing into Sherlock Holmes. She wants answers, damnit. And confirms, once more, she really is the people’s favourite celeb.

There is a 20 minute interview before we can get off the plane!! This is my dream. Police! Talk to me talk to me

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

they put our plane in a secure area. We can’t be near the common folk :(

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

Still on the plane. Starting to get a little…as james franco in spring breakers would say… spicious

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

Despite her best snooping efforts, Teigen said police were questioning the individual – and those that sat next to him on the plane – but that they wouldn’t tell her anything.

Rude.

ok I’m officially ready to say something is up

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

no one will spill anything :( I wish I had more for you guys. I wish I could be your snowden

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

*quits whatever my job is to devote my life to this likely very simple mistake*

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

Finally, she realises the whole situation is really, much bigger than she thought.

That the entire government is clearly involved in a cover-up. And she’s being kept in ‘rooms’ with dodgy television shows and being fed ramen because the higher-ups are worried she’s going to “BLOW THE LID OF THIS SITCH”.

LISTEN: The Mamamia Out Loud team debate a unspoken piece of airplane etiquette. Post continues after audio.

Well, obviously.

I have been moved to a room with Bravo. Clearly the authorities are trying to keep me quiet so I don’t BLOW THE LID OFF THIS “SITCH” pic.twitter.com/ohhpCmjviG

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

I’m in a room with water and a tv! The government is using real housewives to keep me quiet !!!!!! https://t.co/ypPVjAF85C

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

They….they gave me ramen pic.twitter.com/0o9tk0wPrQ

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

No one will answer my questions. I told them I won’t tell anybody but I think they know what’s happening here on the Twitter https://t.co/MlA69QUoHm

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

And, at the end of it all, she drops this – a sentiment to which anyone who’s ever been stuck in an airport can relate – “we live here now”.

We live here now. This is our new life pic.twitter.com/ero7e5kFOm

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) December 27, 2017

Well played, Chrissy. Well played.