If you're worried about the reckoning in childcare, an expert told us what to say to your kids.

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Content warning: this story includes information about child abuse that may be distressing to some readers.

Australia's childcare sector is facing a reckoning.

Recent abuse allegations have prompted calls for nationwide reforms and have left parents grappling with an unthinkable reality: How do you protect a child from predators who hide in plain sight?

Listen: Australia's child care sector is reeling after child sex abuse allegations. Post continues below.

Prevention starts with conversation, says Victoria Barendsen, a New Zealand-based psychologist whose mission is to help parents prevent sexual abuse.

Barendsen told Mamamia it's important to teach a child the proper names for body parts from as young as possible.

No matter how uncomfortable the conversation may be.

"I did this with my children from birth and I highly recommend it," Barendsen said. "There are quite a few reasons behind it. Number one is about shame and stigma. I always say, 'if you can call an elbow an elbow, why would you call a vulva a fanny?' You're instantly setting this groundwork, or foundation, to a child that this is not a part of the body we talk about openly.

"If we want a child to feel empowered in their body and to be able to speak to us openly and honestly, it's really important they have the language to do that."

Barendsen's second point is that, by doing so, it can act as a deterrent for sex offenders.

"There has been some research done, conversations with convicted child sex offenders. One of the big deterrents that they've said around whether they harm a child, or groom a child, is whether that child has the correct anatomical language for their body. It tells them these are the conversations that are happening at home. This child knows about their body, they're more likely to know about their boundaries. They are more likely to have a safe person that's having these conversations with them."

Lastly, it gives children who have been sexually abused the proper language to talk about what happened to them.

Barendsen's focus on body-safe education was born from the years she spent doing trauma work with children.

Watch: Victoria explains what 'body safety education' is — and why it's important. Post continues after video.

"I got a role in a local not-for-profit, which supports children who were either sexually abused or had engaged in harmful sexual behaviour towards other children," she said, explaining a conversation with a patient, who had experienced sexual abuse and went on to harm his siblings, set her on her current path. "It completely threw me because I was pregnant with my first child and I was like, 'wow, I don't think I can keep working in this space if I'm not focusing on prevention.'"

She has now made body-safe education a normal and natural part of her own children's upbringing.

"The work I have done has really exposed me to the dangers that are out there, and I just wanted to ensure it never happened to my children," she said. "My daughter, she's four now, and she has no concept that her vulva can not be talked about in any other way than her ear would be talked about, or her nose. For her, it's just a normal part of her body."

Victoria has taught her own children body safety, and wants to help other parents do the same. Image: Supplied.

The mother-of-two also shared the signs to look out for that may indicate a child is being abused.

These include: sudden withdrawal — or big behavioural or emotional shifts — no longer doing activities that were previously enjoyed, and if they start exploring their body and engaging in sexual behaviour "that's not developmentally appropriate."

"That doesn't necessarily mean sexual abuse," she added.

Should a parent suspect the worst, the way they should approach the conversation depends on their child's age.

"(For) a pre-school-aged child, I might engage in some form of play. So, we might do Lego or play with teddies, and I would then watch how the play happened. I would be noticing if there were boundaries being crossed or questions around consent or around private parts," she said. "As a child gets older, it's important to ask. It's about being really curious, but not doing it in a confrontational way … So it's like, 'yeah, I'm noticing this within your behaviour, and I'm wondering why it's happening'. It's a really gentle way of opening a conversation."

Barendsen added parents should ask open-ended questions and not set an "agenda" for the conversation.

"If your child does start talking, it could be about anything, but in this case it's just lots of open-ended questions like: 'what happened next? Can you tell me a little bit more about that? How did you feel at that time?' Really (you're) not leading the conversation anywhere, but allowing a child to express whatever has gone on from their perspective and their experience," she said.

In a world where predators exploit silence and shame, Barendsen's message is clear — giving children the language and confidence to speak up isn't just recommended.

It's essential.

If this brings up any issues for you, contact Bravehearts, an organisation dedicated to the prevention and treatment of child sexual abuse, on 1800 272 831.

For help and support for those with complex trauma, the Blue Knot Foundation is there to help. Blue Knot Helpline and Redress Support Service provides specialist trauma counselling to adult survivors of childhood trauma including child sexual abuse.

Feature image: Getty.