I spent much of last night’s episode of Married At First Sight with my hands in front of my face. (If you missed it, check out our recap here.)
Oh, the drama! The awkwardness! The intensity! If it wasn’t Alene’s hard-ass girlfriend grilling Simon at dinner, it was slimy Anthony laying the brat routine on Nadia hard and fast. I mean, really – who are these people?
But the prize for the most unbearable character surely must go to Cheryl’s buffoon of a father, Hamish.

I found myself gasping in shock every time Hamish spoke. If he had been a fictional character on a soap opera, I might have giggled at him hamming up the ‘protective father’ role. It could have been comical. But no, Hamish Maitland is very real, and not funny in the slightest.