Men have shared the worst things about being a man, and their responses are fascinating.

We’re living in a moment that will be recognised in history as one in which women started finally being listened to.

The empowered and the powerful are speaking out about the struggles many women have endured silently for years. Sexual harassment and assault. Pay inequality. Infertility and pregnancy loss. The mental load. The bullshit objective that is work/life balance.

So in this spirit of openness and equality, columnist, author and feminist champion Caitlin Moran recently offered the men of Twitter the chance to share the “downsides” they experience courtesy of their gender. The answers ranged from minor quibbles like ear hair and not having an equivalent to sexy nightwear, to the pain that comes with repressing emotions.

By far the most common theme among the more than 6800 responses centred around men’s struggles to remain within the confines of the masculine ideal.

We have very few avenues to emotionally express ourselves. We’re supposed to fit this stereotype of being tough and only wanting touch if it comes with sex.

I want a hug and head pats, dammit.

— Ash Menon (@ashvinmenon) October 19, 2018

when my wife leaves the room she blows out the expensive candles as they’re ‘wasted’ on me on my own…

— andrew glover (@thequestingvole) October 18, 2018

no one will ever buy me flowers. I like flowers.

— Jamie McHale (@Jamie_McHale) October 18, 2018

Realise that this is extremely minor but I am sick of being shamed for enjoying fancy bubble baths or having a Lush loyalty card https://t.co/V1VRAUnndI

— hussein kesvani (@HKesvani) October 18, 2018

The pictures on the front of Men’s Health Magazine. I never grew up with or saw any men who looked like this. I know women have always been bombarded with unrealistic womanhood from the glossies/TV, but now men are getting the same treatment. I sympathise.
Anyway off to the gym.

— pigs feet (@pigs_feet) October 18, 2018

Making the first move all the time kinda sucks. You gotta be the one to ask, the one to message first, the one to put your heart out there (not a universal rule but 90% of the time it feels that way). Wanna give a big thanks to all the women who take the first step, really helps

— Brogan Holmes-Briggs (@BroganBriggs) October 19, 2018

For others, the drawbacks are more physical/anatomical.

Never getting to be pregnant. Although I’m not desperate about the actual giving birth bit I think (parts of) having another human being grow inside you must be pretty amazing.

— Alex Crook (@awjcrook) October 18, 2018

Ear hair.
Everything else is nifty.
Thanks for asking.

— Curtis Stigers (@curtisstigers) October 19, 2018

And for some, a bit of both.

The two biggest ones:

– I genuinely struggle to open up emotionally to anyone other than my girlfriend. She pretty much carries me sometimes. I feel society is changing on this one though.

– In the summer my balls get stuck to my leg and it is so uncomfortable.

— Mike Searle (@MikeSearle493) October 19, 2018

Many felt uncomfortable that they make women feel uncomfortable.

Trying to walk in a quiet street behind a woman whilst overthinking how you can reassure her you’re not an attacker and simply just trying to get home, too – but only communicate that through your footsteps.

— Joshua Fowler (@joshuaffowler) October 18, 2018

I’m a woman but something I’ve noticed my husband and his friends struggle with is people being suspicious if they are friendly to kids, especially if they don’t have their own kids with them. Making sure they avert their eyes when walking past a playground, that sort of thing…

— Marion B (@mazsingsuk) October 18, 2018

But another running theme was isolation. Not having anyone to talk to, the expectation that they swallow their feelings, drink a cup of concrete and harden up.

One of the downsides is that we are crap at talking about, well, the downsides.

— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) October 18, 2018

Oh.
I thought it was just me…

— Ali ????☀️ #FBPE (@ali__samson) October 19, 2018

We simply don’t have anyone to talk to. Going to a psychiatrist is expensive and looked down on socially, friends don’t take you seriously unless there’s something REALLY wrong, and it’s hard to trust people with sensitive subjects. It’s probably why many people drink.

— Burkhart (@BigJBurkhart) October 19, 2018

I literally only began learning in the last 2-3 years how to share my emotions with my wife; and how to hear her problems without feeling pressure to try and ‘solve’ them away. I never knew that just saying it and hearing it was good enough. This might be an overshare, sorry.

— Paul Almond (@pjalmond) October 18, 2018

When women get beaten up by life, their friends gang up to support them. Men don’t. Sometimes all you need is a hug.

— Mark Stradling (@oldmansteptoe) October 18, 2018

Very few problems have ever been solved on Twitter, but my goodness this is one hell of a start.

For more from the brilliant Caitlin Moran, listen to her chat with Mamamia’s No Filter podcast.