'I thought my marriage would last forever. Within 10 months, it was over.'

When Sarah* imagined her wedding day, she shared the same dreams as countless little girls. The big, white dress. The perfect venue. The dreamy romance of it all.

She got it all.

But what she didn't get was a happily ever after with her husband. Because, within 10 months, her marriage was over.

"It was really embarrassing," she told Mamamia. "I made such a fuss that this was my 'forever'. I felt like a massive failure."

The truth? Her picture-perfect wedding day masked something much darker. Coercive control. Extreme jealousy. Violent outbursts. All a far cry from the fairytale she thought she would be living in.

Watch: How to support someone going through a divorce. Post continues below.

Sarah met Max* when she was just 19. He was a few years older, charming and knew exactly how to sweep her off her feet.

Flowers. Fancy dinners. All the classic moves.

"I got swept up in it really quickly," Sarah said.

But the charm didn't last long. Max became increasingly jealous.

"He would get really upset if I spoke to people… if a boy spoke to me," she said.

"It was probably my first real grown-up relationship, so I thought that's what relationships were supposed to be like.

"I thought it was because he loved me."

Having had a difficult childhood, with strained family relationships, Sarah felt like she had nowhere to turn. Max systematically chipped away at her self-esteem, leaving her thinking, "He loves me. I'm lucky he loves me. I just need to change my behaviour."

By the time she was 24, Sarah and Max were engaged. They planned their wedding day for the following year, and Sarah hoped it would be everything she'd ever dreamed of.

When her big day finally arrived, Sarah felt as though she was in a fairytale — it was everything she'd hoped it would be, complete with a stunning dress, dream venue and even a harpist.

"I was more focused on the wedding than the marriage itself," Sarah recalled.

"When I told people we were engaged… it was quite obvious to other people that it wasn't a great relationship."

You know that feeling when everyone else can see what you can't?

It took Sarah years to realise just how bad things truly were in the relationship because she was determined to have her happily ever after.

"I wanted to get married and have children and have a family because I didn't have that family myself," she said.

After the wedding, nothing changed. If anything, things got worse.

Sarah desperately wanted children, but she began to realise she wasn't in a safe environment to bring them into the world.

"He had a really bad temper," she recalled. "He never hit me, but he'd punch holes in the walls, yell, smash things."

That's when it clicked: "I don't think I can bring kids into this relationship."

It was her turning point. After 10 months of marriage, she left Max and filed for divorce.

The shame that lingers.

While Sarah knew leaving was the right thing to do, she struggled with grieving the future she thought she'd have.

"I felt like a massive failure," she said.

"It took me a really long time to realise I was in an abusive relationship. I just felt like it was all my fault."

It took her years to unpack. Even now, almost 20 years later, happily remarried with a daughter, the shame occasionally surfaces.

"I still feel really silly. It's this thing I push in the corner," she said.

"Once I realised the type of relationship it was, I felt stupid for marrying him."

But Sarah doesn't blame her younger self anymore.

"I was young and idealistic and wanted that happily ever after that was sold to us," she said.

For years, Sarah thought she'd never marry again.

"You don't really understand the real intricacies of relationships when you're young," she said.

Now, happily married, the concept of marriage means something completely different to Sarah now.

"We're equal in the relationship. I don't feel afraid," she said.

"I always felt like I was walking on eggshells and I don't think I even realised that until I was in a healthy relationship."

It's not quite like the movies — but it's real, it's fair, and honestly? That's so much better than any fairytale.

*Names changed for privacy.

Feature image: Getty.