"This vacuum cleaner is legitimately the best money I've ever spent."

Note: This post is not sponsored. I also paid for the product myself. I just really, really like it. 

After a vacuum cleaner carked it on me within 12 months of being purchased, I was pissed.

One day, it was fine, picking up bits of fluff and hair left, right, and centre. The next? The crappy thing was completely devoid of suction. Nil. Zilch. Nada. I’d have better spent my time asking my boyfriend to inhale near our bedroom floor for 20 minutes.

After some physical aggression and yelling (broken appliances have a knack for bringing out my dark side) I announced I was done – DONE – with budget vacuum cleaners.

“I AM DONE WITH BUDGET VACUUM CLEANERS,” I yelled to my boyfriend, beads of sweat rolling down my forehead. “DONE.”

No more. This time, I was going to get a fancy vacuum cleaner. 

In the interests of honesty, about a month passed between the vacuum dying, our carpet swallowing as much junk as possible, and me working up the courage to say goodbye to hundreds of dollars.

But on Monday, I did it.

I stormed into Harvey Norman with the confidence of a white male real estate agent and demanded they show me their best small vacuums. I’d done my research online, but wanted some professional advice. “I have a one bedroom apartment and want a fancy vacuum,” I informed the lady. She led the way to a majestic creature.

“This. You need this,” the vacuum expert lady told me. “And it’s on sale.”

The Bosch vacuum was white. And very fancy. And cordless. And – my favourite part – marked down from $499 to $298.

Can young kids take over smart homes to order toys and delivery pizza? We discuss, on our podcast for imperfect parents.

I had never bought a Bosch vacuum before (my mum and sister are die-hard Dyson fanatics) so made some kind of excuse that I needed to call my partner to discuss. Instead, I scurried away and looked up every review I could find.

WELL.

Over 450 people have reviewed the Bosch Athlet Vacuum on the Harvey Norman website. They have returned an average rating of 4.8/5 stars.

Everybody freaking loves it. Even this reviewer, whose comments made my heart sing: “I am unable to do many tasks due to my illness. I have severe chronic long term pain and nerve problems throughout my body… During the past fortnight, while sitting, I used the Bosch handheld vacuum cleaner. I find the product light enough to use for 10 minutes without causing or increasing my pain levels. I recommend this item for both disabled and able bodied people.”

Needless to say, I paid the $298 and ran out of there. I charged the vacuum as soon as I got home and it is the best freaking thing I have purchased in my entire life.

Not an exaggeration. I think I am in love with this vacuum cleaner.

The amount of dust and dirt and hair it sucked out of our carpet was both incredible and horrifying. It became so fun that my boyfriend and I took apart our couch just so we could vacuum some more.

An added bonus? It picked up hair like a total champ. If you’re a person with fallopian tubes, you know that is an… important feature.

I’m a week in, yes, but if the hundreds of reviews are anything to go by, this will be a very longterm and delightful relationship. I also have a two-year warranty, so have that added peace of mind.

Oh, and for those of us who don’t live in small apartments or homes, the larger Bosch Relaxx’x ProPerform Bagless Vacuum is perfect for families, and available on Mamamia Shopping with a neat little discount (other retail stores have it priced at $550, you can get it for $499). I’ve never tried this one, but the three people who have reviewed it on the Harvey Norman website so far all gave it five stars.

So, from one lady to another: Bosch vacuums, you guys. Get on them.

You can buy the Bosch Athlet Cordless Vacuum here, and the Bosch Relaxx’x ProPerform Bagless Vacuum here.