We thought the clit hammock was an uncomfortable bikini trend.
And then we saw this:
Yes, that’s actual metallic tape on an actual woman and that tape is the only thing standing between her and being naked on the beach.
It’s from swimwear designer and artist, Joel Alvarez, who aptly names his designs the Black Tape Project.
His designs first set brains on fire when they made their debut at New York Fashion Week last September.
But since then, Joel has taken his designs to a whole new level of intricacy.
And while these are not bikinis (if you can call them that) that we would ever wear (if you can use that word) ourselves, we have to admit, they do look pretty damn incredible.
And in case the implications weren’t clear, each piece of tape has been carefully affixed to the wearer by Joel himself, trimmed and placed to form intricate geometric designs.
So yes, he has to get very close to his models.
Our first thought upon seeing these designs was: No.
Second thought: You can't possibly be expected to wear these out in public can you? And certainly not in the water?
Third thought - and perhaps the most pressing: What happens when you try to take it off?
Anyone who's had the unfortunate need to have strapping tape on their ankle or heck, has even removed a particularly sticky Band-Aid knows how painful it can be.
Only times it by 50. Because this time you're stripping something sticky from your vagina.
But if you're feeling particularly bold, you can try your hand at making your own tape bikini at home.
Joel sells all the body tape used in his designs on the Black Tape Project website for US$29.95 ($42.70). A bargain really, considering the price of most swimwear.
If you really want a cheap bikini though, head down to your local hardware store. They'll sell you some duct tape for about $4. Best of luck.
