'My husband made me pay my hospital bill after I gave birth.'

Imagine giving birth and the most migraine-inducing part of the whole ordeal is having to deal with your partner afterwards.

Well, that's what it was like for one woman who was forced to deal with an irate partner, a newborn baby and a hospital bill that amounted to almost five figures. 

If you're confused, allow us to explain. 

A Reddit post has resurfaced and gone viral after a woman asked on the 'Am I The A**hole?' subreddit (where people ask if they are correct or incorrect in a certain situation) if she was the a**hole for expecting her partner to pay half of the hospital bill after she gave birth to their child.

Are you all ready to hate someone pic.twitter.com/mmR9Ofu0kQ

— tacos (@thiscassgirl) March 4, 2023

In the post, the exhausted new mother explained she was turning to Reddit "as a last resort because I genuinely think this problem could be the end of my marriage".

She shared that they have been married for seven years and at the time of the post, had welcomed their baby just three months prior. 

The bliss of having a newborn wasn't lost on the couple, but then things took a dreadful turn. 

"Everything was going well and we were in our little newborn bubble of bliss until the hospital bill came," she wrote. 

"Both my husband and I have jobs and everything financially is split 50/50, but we've always kept our money separate, with the exception of a joint account for bills."

The original poster then shared that although she planned to go for a natural birth with no medication, she "caved" at the 24-hour mark of labour and asked for an epidural.

"My husband had no problem with it and even encouraged it," she shared. "[But] when the bill came he brought it to me to pay all $8,000 (after insurance) from my personal savings. I asked, 'Why?' He said, 'You're the one that couldn't hold out for a few more hours and jacked up the bill with all your meds and an extra night's stay'. [He said] he shouldn't have to pay for all of my extra requests. If I wanted luxury, I should expect to pay for it."

*Picks jaw up off floor.*

"I was stunned and flipped out, but I'll spare you the details."

The new mother says what has added to the stress is the fact she ended up taking on the cost by herself. 

"He refuses to budge, calling me a princess for expecting him to pay for all the 'extra add-ons' I requested in the hospital. This is by far the biggest issue in our 14-year-long relationship so far and I'm so lost on where to go from here," she explained. "I gave in and paid the bill, but since then we haven't been talking much. 

"Honestly, I just feel disrespected. Do I have the right to feel this way or is it just hormones?"

Watch the viral reddit post that explains everything. Post continues after video. 

Obviously, it's very clear who the a**hole is here and it's not the wife... 

After reading this story, many of us were thinking the same things:

Is this woman okay? Did they end up getting a divorce? Did they sort out their issues? And... is this the case for a lot of families?

We wanted to know the answer to that last question very much, so we asked our wider Mamamia community what their financial rules are.

Do these couples believe in splitting the bill? Is there only one person in control of the finances leaving the other partner without access to money? 

Here's what eight women told us.

"We used to pay equal amounts."

"When we first got together, we used to pay equal amounts into a joint account which would cover rent, food and any other shared expenses. After a couple of years, we were engaged and bought our first house together, so then we changed to all of our income going into the joint account (regardless of who earns more). We keep a weekly allowance to spend on whatever we like without the other person questioning and feeling like it’s unfair." — Tash.

"Everything is shared because we share our whole life."

"It makes no sense to me to want to share a life with someone but not share assets and finances. I know a couple in their 50s who have been together 20ish years and it’s his house, she pays for groceries, and they pay for different bills. He earns more so sometimes he goes to events that she can’t afford to go to. It’s so weird. My husband and I split everything; child support for my stepchildren comes out of our joint account and all bills come from our joint account — everything is shared because we share our whole life.

"I'm a SAHM now and I work one day a week for my husband’s company. I can’t imagine trying to split things – like, would he pay me as a nanny for the other four days a week he’s at work? It’s just our life and we both contribute in different ways." — Emma.

"What's mine is mine. What's his is ours."

"What’s mine is mine. What’s his is ours. I have been with my husband for 30 years. We have tried many ways to work out our finances over the years. Splitting equally, paying for certain bills, etc. In the last few years, he has earned significantly more than me so it has just eased into me paying for groceries, gifts, phone bills and a little off the mortgage, and he pays for everything else. He makes it very clear that it is our money and we trust each other to not overspend. Big purchases are discussed first." — Denise.

"I pay what I can."

"I've been with my partner for 12 years and we’ve lived together in a house we own for three years. I financially cannot contribute what he does as he earns double to triple what I do. He knows this and has never, not once, held it over my head or used it to hurt me. He just pays what he can and I pay what I can. I contribute what I can to our joint savings and any joint purchases or expenses we make or have come out of that, like a recent renovation we did.

"We do not have children and don’t want them. If we did, hospital expenses – like our vet expenses for our dog – would come out of that joint savings, no questions asked. To split bills for smaller expenses like a date night, it’s kind of the 'he who smelt it dealt it' rule. Whoever asked the other out to dinner/movies whatever, pays." — Sarah.

"I have a card linked to his accounts."

"My husband and I have separate bank accounts and separate finances, however I have a card linked to his accounts. He earns significantly more than me so when we go out for tea he pays." — Nicole.

"We have no separate money."

"Everything shared for us here. We have no separate money. However, I am conscious this works for us as we have a place of trust and safety, both emotional and financial, that not everyone is provided in their relationships." — Jessica. 

"We've had a shared account for 15 years."

"Married for six years but together for almost 19. We have shared money and had a shared account from the time we moved in together 15 years ago." — Claire.

"We have separate bank accounts."

"Married nearly 20 years. We have separate bank accounts. I take a certain amount per month from his to cover half of all expenses, then pay from mine. What's left in his account is then his to spend as he wishes and what's left in mine is mine. Simple and works perfectly for us." — Belinda.

Feature Image: Getty.