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Bill Shorten shared some advice for Year 12 students and well, it's terribly unhelpful. 

 

When I was at school, stressing about getting an assignment finished at 11:30pm on a Tuesday night, my mum would say: “It’s OK darling. Just do what’s due tomorrow.”

Now, she meant well. But those words have now become a family joke.

Because why would I be up at 11:30pm with tears streaming down my face over an assignment due in two and a half weeks, Mum? Chances are it was due last Friday but the guilt has only just got to me. 

Much like my mum, Bill Shorten likely also means well.

As New South Wales heads into their final week of HSC exams, and Queensland yesterday sat their English exam, students all over the country are visiting Twitter, desperate to find some invaluable advice from 51-year-old opposition leader, Bill Shorten.

And yesterday, he delivered.

AHEM.

“My tips,” he wrote. “Take your time, read the question and relax. Everything will be fine.”

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WUT?

We're shook.
We're shook.
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All these years Australian students have been sitting their exams, covering the question with their left hand and then writing whatever came to mind. Whether it be about cows, how to bake a bread and butter pudding, or the Russian Revolution.

IMAGINE IF THEY'D ONLY READ THE QUESTION.

So rather than cross the question out, wear a set of eye patches so you can't see what's on the paper, or bring scissors into the exam in order to cut the question perfectly from the exam paper, Shorten says to read it.

But there's more. 

Take. Your. Time.

You have precisely 90 minutes to complete this paper which seems fairly tight given how much you're expected to write, but never mind all that.

Sit down. Count your fingers. Then count your toes. Count the strands of hair on your head before learning to speak Spanish. Read a book. Take a holiday. Have a nap.

Just be sure to take your (90 minutes) time. 

We have no doubt that after Shorten's wise words, the 2018 results will be unparalleled.

Don't forget: Read the question, take your time, do today's exam not tomorrow's, don't do it upside down, ensure you're conscious and present at the exam, write your English exam in English, bring a pen, don't burn the paper when you're done (or eat it) and when it asks for an essay don't draw a foot.

It's very simple.

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