sex

"I'm 'high maintenance' and I don't think there's anything wrong with that."

 

Image via Paramount Pictures.

Like many people, The Bachelor  and The Bachelorette is my not-so-secret guilty pleasure. It wasn’t the contestant’s attempts to win Sam Wood’s heart that I’m fascinated by – it’s the battle of the “low maintenance” versus the “high maintenance” women that intrigues me.

Each week, we’ve saw those who weren’t keen to dip their heads in buckets of freezing cold water or go on national television bare-faced dubbed ‘high maintenance’, as though it’s a terrible, shameful thing.

After one episode, I asked my partner which category he thought I fell under. Without a moment of hesitation, he replied: “High maintenance, for sure”. Immediately, I felt pissed off and hurt.

But after I shrugging off my annoyance I realised that there’s no solid reason to brandish someone who’s “high maintenance” as superficial, or someone less deserving than their “low maintenance” sisters.

Yes, I might use double the beauty products other women use to get ready each day. No, I’m not the biggest fan of beer, sports or going out sans makeup.

But I’m also someone who is smart, speaks my mind, has empathy for others and can – shock horror – associate with those who don’t share the same passion for beauty as me. (Post continues after gallery.)

 

Why is that something that I should be ashamed of? Or try to play down around others so as to craft the image that I’m a laid back au naturel kind of woman (not that there’s anything wrong with that if it’s your bag).

I’m sick of feeling ashamed because I’m not naturally the “cool girl”, the ‘dream woman’ Gillian Flynn describes in her novel Gone Girl as the “hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes and burping. They never get angry… and let their men do whatever they want.”

ADVERTISEMENT

My opinion? Trying to be the cool girl actually takes a lot more effort than my getting-ready-routine. If you think about it, ‘high maintenance’ actually suggests a lot of positive attributes. And I’m out and proud about it.

"Being a laidback 'cool girl' actually takes a lot of bloody effort." Image via Gone Girl.

 

It means you know what you want and you're not afraid to ask for it or carry it out. That you speak your mind, have the confidence to be yourself and are totally unapologetic for it.

It does not mean you're superficial and self-obsessed simply because you like fashion or makeup. Being down to earth, loving and friendly are not exclusive to those who consider themselves "low maintenance".

From now on, if someone labels me "high maintenance", I'll wear it with pride.

Have you been called 'high maintenance' before?

00:00 / ???