What the hell did that Bridgerton boy just say to her?

If a Bridgerton boy has one thing, it's beautiful hair. If he has another, it's audacity.

Proposing to a woman because you have a soul-destroying crush on her sister. Being mad that your wife secured gainful employment (okay, she was secretly writing a newspaper column about everyone's personal lives, but still). Getting inappropriately steamy in the servant's quarters.

It's pure buffoonery, one season after another.

They're a trio of lustful idiots with terrible romantic instincts. And yet, we love them dearly, and we gleefully waited for Bridgerton Season 4: Part One, which just premiered on Netflix overnight.

As this new love story played out on our screens in sweeping scenes — longing glances across rooms, gentle touches of the hand, a stunning homage to Mr Darcy's swim in Pride and Prejudice — fans had no choice but to fall for Benedict Bridgerton (Luke Thompson) and Sophie Baek (Yerin Ha).

He's the noble gentleman with eyes for one woman: a maid he can never have. Their heartfelt yearning, their wistful enchantment — we've been thrilled by each and every second of it.

But then something happened.

At the very end of the fourth episode, Benedict made the decision to recklessly and boldly go get the girl. He stormed his way into the servant's quarters in Bridgerton House, chasing down Sophie to declare his love and make a sinister suggestion.

They dramatically collided in the stairwell and stared at each other for 10 very lustful seconds before kissing and "heaving" and proving there's a third thing Bridgerton boys love doing.

Image: Netflix.

And if their first steamy encounter didn't give you a little blush (the image of Benedict Bridgerton sucking his fingers didn't do it for you? Intrigue!) then his romantic declaration that followed should do the trick.

"I stay away because you consume me," Benedict declared. "My eyes search for you in every room I enter, my heart beats when you're near.

You know who was blushing? Sophie! Because she just had her first official orgasm™ with the hottest boy in London and now he's grovelling and staring at her with big Bambi eyes and saying he is obsessed with her.

"The reality of you has become more tantalising than any fantasy ever could be, and one I could not live without," his declaration continued, as Sophie's face lit up with glee, picturing a life filled with wisteria, the Bridgerton surname and stairwell orgasms.

"I meant it when I said you deserved better, and I am determined to give it to you and more," he said.

Oh my god! That's so good Benedict! You shouldn't say anything else.

"Sophie, will you be my mistress?" Benedict asked.

I had to pause the show and stare at the wall for a while. I paced my apartment. I threw my hands up in exasperation in a show of solidarity for Sophie because I needed to do something but they're not real and they can't see me.

It was the question felt viscerally by every girl around the world who has ever lived through a situationship with a man named Jack or Ben (sorry for the rogue strays but… well… you know).

Because here's the thing: yeah, they're in a weird Regency Era entanglement and they are facing the very real romantic obstacle of class division (and also, somewhat, the fact that Benedict still has a crush on the masked woman, whom he is too stupid to realise is also Sophie). But mostly it's the society thing.

So they don't really have "options" and in all likelihood, he would not be proposing the concept of mistressing to this woman if he had the option of proposing the other thing.

And yet.

Of all the options and with all the warning in the world for those of us who have read the book, this question still stunned me. It made me feel like my own heart was being ripped from my chest as I stared wide-eyed at this ridiculous man.

On a deeper level, there's obviously a lot to dissect about why a woman of Sophie's background (being the child of a 'mistress') would literally recoil at the offer to be kept as any man's secret. To be expected to jump at such an offensive proposition.

But even just at surface level with no deeper inspection, this is some classic male batshit crazy behaviour. And I expected better from the most romantic brother, Benedict.

Even if it "had" to happen "for the plot" because "this is television" — it was painfully cruel to watch unfold. This hurt just as much, if not more, than watching Anthony Bridgerton propose to Edwina Sharma in front of Kate Sharma. And that was diabolically stupid.

Image: Netflix.

The worst part is now we need to sit with it for a month. Just me in my house and you in your house, cringing and wincing and ruminating on how the hell Benedict is going to get out of this predicament he's landed himself in.

The good news, is that Bridgerton boys may have audacity and a penchant for third base — but they're also notoriously good at wooing the girl when the moment is right.

However, for the series' golden boy to redeem himself in the eyes of the viewer, it's going to take some serious grovelling and levels of down-bad emotional distress never before seen on screen. We want to see that boy suffer on his way to ending up with Sophie.

But if anyone can pull it off, I have all of my faith in showrunner Jess Brownell. If not because this season is currently shaping up to be one of the best yet thanks to her vision, but simply because I know how deeply she understands the true core and essence of these characters. She will be sure to put that boy through the ringer to make him worthy of Sophie's affections once more. 

And I know Violet Bridgerton raised him god-damn better than this. Now, Benedict just needs to prove it.

Feature Image: Getty.