‘I asked a shop assistant to help me with foundation. Her response surprised me.'

A thing you might not know about me: While I receive approximately eleventy million beauty products to try every week, I still spend a silly amount of money on makeup. And skincare. And haircare. And look, she may not have enough money for a house deposit in Sydney but is that a Pat McGrath Mothership Eyeshadow Palette?! (It is).

Now, while you'll usually catch me trawling the online streets of Adore Beauty to pick up my beauty goods, this weekend I actually ventured out of the house (!!!) to get a new foundation. IRL. 

It's one I've wanted to try for yonks. My younger sister recommended it to me, and she's cool and young and has skin that looks like magic, so I was keen to see if it could work for me. 

I was originally going to purchase it online, but I'm forever buying foundation shades that don't match my skin, so I wanted to make sure I could get myself the right colour.

So, off I went to the shops.

Watch: You know what else I've done? Put lube on your face because everyone (TikTok) told me it's better than primer. here's what happened. Post continues below.

Now, for a bit of background — I've been breaking out like a 15-year-old as of late. 

I recently went off the Pill after 12 years, so my skin has been sporting some pretty gnarly cystic spots. You know, the hormonal ones you can't squeeze and just have to live with for a bit.

Anyway. It's been a while since I've felt this way about my skin, but after a 'who gives a f**k' call with my sister and some hardworking concealer (the new CoverGirl stuff is legit, by the way), I dusted off my self-esteem and headed to the shops.

Upon walking into the store and spotting the foundation section, the shop assistant came over and very kindly offered to help me with colour matching. 

Nice! 

I swatched three different shades of formula on my cheek (away from my angry chin and nose area), blended them in and selected the winner (which looks great, by the way).

The shop assistant then did the "do you need help with anything else?" thing, and I politely did the "no, that's all I need for today, thanks," thing.

But then she added another thing, that went like, "Do you need me to help you with something for your breakouts and dark circles?"

my soul is in pieces xx

... HAHA-WHAT-DID-SHE-JUST-SAY-HAHA.

And look, I know she was just doing her job — I know that. I have a deep respect for her commitment to the sale, no matter how profoundly painful it (clearly) was. But, like, f**k.

In the space of, like, five minutes, she'd managed to turn what should have been a brief foundation-matching moment into me potentially going back on the Pill and booking in for tear trough filler.

Turns out, the in-store banter is not it. ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯ 

I think... I think this is why I do the online shopping? Maybe? Definitely.

The shop attendant went on to pop a sample of primer into my bag, explaining what primer was, why I might want to try it, and had I ever used vitamin C before? It helps with dull skin...

And okay, but this is why we can't have nice things.

I walked out the store (paid for my stuff) (obvs, haha) and wondered if this was just what always happened when you bought stuff in real life? 

I mean, perhaps I had just forgotten what it was like? After all, I've been predominately buying my beauty products online (or at a chemist or grocery stores) for ages now??

But I just... I just need to know why the lady asked me that.

In fact, upon complaining pitching this, my colleague said my story reminded her about when she had an injectable treatment for the first time. 

She said, "After getting anti-wrinkle injections in my forehead, the injector then told me I need to fix my smile and extend my chin. I was like, thanks but no thanks. I like both those features. Maybe this is why I've not gone back?"

And, goodness. YES. This is exactly what it's like. 

Truly, there's nothing quite like someone pointing out something that's 'wrong' with you when you never asked. It's giving five-year-old with no social filter.

But alas, there's always going to be something or someone out to get you when you're buying something. 

That's just how it is. 

Whether it's the cheeky sale that excludes the one thing you want to purchase (always). The fitting room curtain that just WON'T SHUT (someone, pls). Or the car ticket that disappeared into an *actual* vortex and now you have to pay $50 for a small square of paper.

Shopping IRL can be a bit s**t.

For me, I think it just served as a reminder that beauty shopping can be a bit of a battlefield — I feel like I almost forgot that for a minute. Especially when you ask someone for something. You should never ask someone for something. 

I jest, I jest. (Kind of).

But seriously, while I'll always kind of love the experience of browsing through beauty products in person (so many colours! sniffs good! so much choice!), deep down I know I always can't help but walk past certain stores I actually really like, knowing what the shop attendants/general vibe is like, and thinking to myself, 'I'll just look online.'

Of course, my raging spots, the dark circles and I are just fine.

Just don't mind me while I go back to my online cart, where I have nothing to worry about except for free Tim Tams and zero judgement. 

And yes, for the love of lactic acid... I know what a primer is.

Obviously if you are an in-store beauty gal, you ought to let me know why you love that IRL shopping experience so much. Can't be all about me, can it? Share your thoughts in the comment section below.

Feature image: Erin Docherty

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