'It belongs in the bin.' A definitive ranking of Arnott's Biscuits from diabolical to God-tier.

Here at Mamamia, we love to rank truly random things. Real Housewives series? Done that. Arnott's Shapes — absolutely. We've also done Easter Eggs, TV shows, Celebrations chocolates and more.

Most of the time, there's a lot of agreement over what should be lower in the tier, and what's top dog, with disagreement over the middle. But when it comes to Arnott's Biscuits... there might be some tension over this one.

I've decided to throw myself on the sword and rank our favourite nostalgic biscuits — strong opinions and all.

Watch: Monique Bowley's failsafe Anzac biscuit recipe. Post continues below.

Is this a ranking of every single Arnott's biscuit? No. There are simply far too many on the market, and in different categories to cream biscuits — like Tim Tams, Arnott's Cookies or the iconic Mint Slice.

In fact, 2024 was Arnott's 60th birthday year and they just announced that Tim Tams are in fact Australia's most-bought Arnott's product, followed by Barbecue Shapes in runner up.

But here we're talking about staple Arnott's Biscuits. Amongst them there is a supreme winner, and a few that really ought to be put in the bin for good.

So without further ado, here's an Arnott's Biscuits ranking from "absolutely no thank you" to "let me eat the whole box they're that tasty".

11. Arnott's Orange Cream.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

No one deserves to have to eat an Orange Cream. They're just wrong.

Also, the orange colour of the cream makes me uncomfortable. I don't know why.

There are a lot of things wrong in this world and a lot of conflicting opinions. But surely we can all come together and agree that Orange Creams deserve no place in our hearts.

10. Arnott's Shortbread Cream.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

This will perhaps be the most controversial ranking of them all - placing the Shortbread Cream in second last place. Now before some of you come with your pitchforks, let me defend this hot take.

Shortbread Creams are boring - the shortbread itself isn't incredible at all. When I once got my Scottish grandmother to try a Shortbread Cream, her face screwed up in distaste, instead reaching for a Walkers Shortbread which slaps every time. That mentality has stuck with me ever since.

Also - the cream has no flavour, and there isn't enough of it, leaving you with a dry biscuit. How the Shortbread Cream remains one of Arnott's best-selling biscuits never ceases to amaze me.

9. Arnott's Monte Carlo.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

Monte Carlo biscuits are gross. I won't hear otherwise. The reason they aren't the complete worst is because the biscuit's flavour itself is quite nice, albeit it they're far too hard.

It's the inside that is ruinous. It sticks to your teeth. The flavour is weird. The texture is off. Is it supposed to be gum? No, it actually markets itself as being a "sticky jam". Atrocious.

If the ratings on Woolworth's website are anything to go by (and I think they should be treated as gospel), the Monte Carlo has a 1.4 out of 5 rating among 19 passionate reviews. Now that's a quality survey.

8. Arnott's Ginger Nut.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

It breaks my heart to have to score the Ginger Nut so low.

The flavour of these biscuits is great - the ratio of ginger spice is perfection. The colour is appeasing, the size completely adequate, and the aroma delightful.

It's the texture that I have a deep problem with, because every time I bite into a Ginger Nut, I seriously worry I'm going to chip a tooth. They are THAT DAMN HARD. And to really test my theory, I have tried numerous packets of Ginger Nuts from different supermarkets over the years, in case it was a one-off stale batch. And I'm sad to say I am yet to have a non-tooth-braking Ginger Nut.

Ultimately, I don't want to have to go to the dentist over a biscuit. Not in this cost-of-living crisis.

7. Arnott's Milk Arrowroot.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

Sigh. I wish I could rank these higher. They're delightful to dunk in tea - or a glass of milk if you're inclined. But the exact same thought process could be used for Scotch Fingers, which are a far superior biscuit.

Milk Arrowroots are just a little plain. Perhaps verging on boring

"So why have you put this biscuit so high in the ranking?" you might be asking yourselves. Well, the Milk Arrowroot is versatile and points need to be given for that. If keen on making a delightful cheesecake, or a dessert of some sort that needs a biscuit base - you can always rely on some blitzed-up Milk Arrowroots to do the trick.

6. Arnott's Choc Ripple.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

Everyone loves a choccy biscuit.

There are so many on the market as well - and when you consider the bunch holistically, the Choc Ripple is a bit of a forgetful biscuit. The texture is lovely. The chocolate flavour is good - although some little chunks of chocolate in there would really bump it up in the chocolate biscuit ranking.

When there's an Arnott's favourites biscuit assortment packet on the table, Choc Ripple is often one of the first ones to go.

5. Arnott's Lemon Crisp.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

Ahh a Lemon Crisp. It tastes exactly like the name. They're super buttery, and the lemon cream is quite nice (although could be more tart in my foodie opinion). My only con is that they're usually a bit hard to find than the other assortments. So Arnott's stockers if you're listening - up your game my friends.

Are they the best biscuit or one of the top? No.

But are they a reliable choice, and an option that is a little bit different from the bunch? Absolutely.

4. Arnott's Butternut Snap Cookie.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

Now these are good.

Arnott's Butternut Snap Cookie is a crunchy sweet biscuit that reminds you of an Anzac biscuit.

The crunch is great, but not too much. The oats, coconut and golden syrup flavours come through (yes I am a biscuit connoisseur) and it's overall a very comforting biscuit to enjoy.

3. Arnott's Iced Vo Vo.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

These biscuits are a staple in my friendship group, so I've grown to love them over time. For coconut fans, these are seriously delicious. Plus, the generous strip of jam down the middle is heaven.

The Iced Vo Vo is very reminiscent of a finger bun but in biscuit form.

And that is why they deserve a very respectful third place in the official Arnott's Biscuits ranking.

2. Arnott's Scotch Finger.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

The Scotch Finger is the most humble of the Arnott's Biscuits.

It doesn't try to be something it isn't. It hasn't got the bells and whistles, and nor does it need it.

Whenever I feel like a cup of tea, I immediately think of a Scotch Finger. They're a staple biscuit from lots of Aussie childhoods, and the perfect shareable biscuit as well considering they can snap in half. But would I ever share half of a Scotch Finger with someone else? No.

I am also yet to meet a person who doesn't enjoy a Scotch Finger. Enough said.

1. Arnott's Kingston.

Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

The beautiful Kingston will forever remain supreme.

The biscuit - crumbly, soft with still a slight bite, buttery and a party in the mouth.

The filling - a velvety chocolate cream.

The result - a biscuit that melts in the mouth, is the perfect ratio to filling and biscuit, and makes me crave a Kingston just thinking about it. And that is why they will always be number one.

What is your favourite Arnott's biscuit, and also you're least favourite? Let us know in the comments below!

Feature Image: Arnotts/Mamamia.

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