couples

13 things you only understand if you're from a big family.

 

When you’re constantly meeting relations who are a complete surprise to you, you know you’re from a biiiig family.

My family is huge. Massive. Enormous. Gargantuan. Actually, I don’t think any word in the human language can correctly sum up its vastness. And as the youngest in the family, I can attest to every one of the below traits.

Here’s 13 things you understand if you’re from a big family:

1. Shouting is the new speaking.

You are ridiculously well-accustomed to noise. Your family is so used to talking over each other to get a word in, that it always sounds like you’re fighting. You’re not. You’re just trying to be heard. This means your friends usually tell you to keep it down because you speak way. Too. Loudly.

2. The eldests reign supreme…

The eldest in each family are worshipped like Gods but are always telling the youngest how easy they have it. Their photos are plastered everywhere. There are a few photos around of the second sibling and the youngest? Photo-wise you’re non-existent.

3. …But the youngest gets the hand-me-downs.

This consists of everything from kitchen utensils, to toys, to gardening equipment. There’s an avalanche of out-grown clothes in your hallway that you can never seem to keep up with.

4. You have major identity issues.

You’ve been forced to developed a “strong personality” so that your family knows you still exist. But that doesn’t matter because no one can ever remember your name and the youngests always ends up inheriting the older cousins’ reputation anyway.

5. You never get left alone.

Peace and quiet is a rare privilege. When you are with your family, you will have zero alone time so you get used to talking until you get cut off by someone else.

6. There are just simply too many of you…

At family get-togethers, it’s extremely rare that you get to talk to every member of the family. No-one can keep track of everyone’s age and your relatives are truly shocked to find out you’re not 12 anymore. You still haven’t been promoted from “the kids table” because there is just no room at “the adults table”. You’re heading for 30.

ADVERTISEMENT

7. …So everything has to be done in groups…

That goes for everything from group birthdays (which are usually organised by the month), to travelling groups because you need that many damn cars. Getting a family photo requires months of forward planning.

8. …And organised with military precision.

Making a holiday meal requires a very detailed plan of who will bring what and it’s absolutely too much to ask for everyone to get Christmas or birthday gifts so there’s a very complicated kris-kingle system going on.

9. You’re seriously over-protective of everything.

Getting food is a free for all and you eat insanely fast. You have to call “seat saves” before you vacate knowing it will be immediately stolen otherwise.

10. You meet new cousins that you didn’t know about all the time.

You randomly bump into cousins you’ve never met, like at the hairdressers. Through conversation you discover you’re related. Who would’ve thought? You need to be super-careful who you date in case they end up being a distant cousin.

11. Family events become relationship deal-breakers.

Bringing a partner to meet your extended family is a SERIOUS milestone in your relationship. Your entire future teeters precariously on that one event.

12. Time is never of the essence.

You could spend days looking for a car spot because your family have turned a street into a car park. There is ALWAYS a waiting line for the bathroom and saying good-bye at the end of a get-together takes a solid hour.

13. At the end of the day, you are one large group of friends.

As you get older and some move away, you have umpteen places to visit and listening to stories from the past NEVER gets old.

What would you add to this list?

SCROLL THROUGH the gallery for famously big families…

Like this? Try these:
7 things only a soccer parent will understand.

9 things only a mum who’s breastfed will understand.

00:00 / ???